Spring 2025

Boundaries and limits are guidelines and rules set by parents and caregivers to help children understand what is expected of them, and it teaches them how to behave in different situations.​

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Using them helps children feel safe and build confidence in understanding what's expected from them, and teaches respect, responsibility and self-control.

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Boundaries and limits are helpful in areas such as screen time, eating habits, bedtime, chores and responsibilities, behavior and respect, and socializing with friends.

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Parents and caregivers should set limits to boundaries they know they can stick to.  Sticking to your word builds trust, promotes respect and prevents power struggles with children otherwise children will increase testing the limits you've set.

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Maria shares how to set limits using ABC: Acknowledging feelings, Being clear and consistent, and using Consequences and choices.

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Acknowledging feelings - parents and caregivers can acknowledge children's feelings by describing and naming the emotion you think they may be experiencing thereby helping them identify and understand what their feeling.  Showing that you can understand their perspective demonstrates empathy and validates what they are feeling, leading to being heard and understood.

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Being clear and consistent - involves two key elements, stating the rule or what needs to be done and what you would like them to do, and using a calm tone of voice.  A few common sense boundaries include device or screen time (you can watch TV for 30 minutes), getting your homework done (in 15 minutes you have to do your homework), and respectful communication (you can be upset but please speak respectfully).

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Consequences and choice - provide at least one choice and a consequence of action.  Using this common situation of cleaning up toys, you can provide a choice to clean up now or do it after dinner along and a consequence of not doing it now and losing 10 minutes of playtime after dinner. 

When your child's choice invokes the consequence and they're not happy about it, remain calm and remind them they had the option to choose and then follow through with the consequence.

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Maria concludes the seminar by taking participants through several exercises so they can apply their new learnings.

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